• Sexually Transmitted Infections


• Abstinence


• How to Have the Best Sex


• Abstinence Education

Abstinence? Interesting but . . . not very realistic by today's standards. At least, that's what a lot of people would like to think. People like advertisers, TV movies, the music industry—people who don't even know your name, much less anything about YOU. One thing they do know though—if you have money, you're probably going to want to spend it—and they want you to spend it on whatever they have to sell.

But hey! You're smarter than that! You know the only "safe sex" is no sex until marriage (or, at least a committed relationship—committed for a lifetime that is). (By the way, have you noticed that now we are hearing more and more about "safer sex?" Could it be that "safe sex" wasn't so safe after all?) Sure sex is cool, but by saying "no" to sex before you commit to Mr. or Ms. Right "till death do you part," you'll be saying "no" to a lot of other things that aren't so cool. Like Sexually Transmitted Infections (STI), anxiety every month that you might be facing (or be responsible for) parenthood, a ruined reputation, a drastic change to your plans for the future, disappointment when the guy/girl of your dreams breaks up with you.

Oh, I know. Everyone is having sex these days! It may seem like they are, but that's just not true. Fifty per cent of American teenagers are not having sex. How are they managing to resist the temptation? By having a game plan. For instance, start by telling your date that sex is not your idea of a good time at this time in your life (notice that we're talking about now—not forever). If he or she acts like you've lost your mind you have some quick thinking to do. Do you really want to take the risk of going out with someone who doesn't respect your feelings about something as important as your life? No, I'm NOT exaggerating, STIs can lead to death; pregnancy can lead to major changes in your life, and breaking up can lead to a broken heart.

So, you've said "no sex, no way"—now what? I'm glad you asked.
1. Have a plan for the evening (check out the suggestions for creative dates at the end of this article).
2. Fill up the whole evening and don't leave time for parking or sitting on the couch in the dark.
3. Hang out in public places rather than at home by yourselves.
4. Be selective about the movies you watch. There are plenty of movies that won't get you thinking about having sex. Be sure to choose one of those.
5. Determine how far is too far for you. Tell your date ahead of time to stick to your limits.

Here are some of those creative date ideas I told you about. Have fun!
• Go on a picnic with friends
• Buy a cake or plain cookies at the bakery and decorate them with canned frosting and candy sprinkles
• Play on the playground at your old elementary school or in the park
• Have a scavenger hunt for canned goods to give to a local homeless shelter
• Take lessons together—pottery, swing dancing, cooking, sign language, etc.
• Go out for breakfast and a bike ride
• Babysit
• Volunteer to help an elderly person with house or yard work
• Do your homework together
• Work a jigsaw puzzle with your parents
• Go to church together
• Fly a kite
• Fix dinner for yourselves and another couple
• Send e-cards to your friends

You'll think of many more fun dates when you put your mind to it. You'll get to know your date better and you'll really be practicing "safe sex" at the same time! Remember, once you're married everyone will know you are having sex and it will be okay! It will still be exciting and fun—even more so 'cuz there will be no worries. You can do it!

What if you already "did it"?
It's never too late to change your mind and your habits. Starting today you can become a renewed virgin, fully determined to make a game plan and to follow if for a physically and emotionally healthy future. You can do it, too!

Here are some links to more information:
www.serve.com/fem4life
www.medinstitute.org
www.teenpregnancy.org
www.ratedg.com/straighttalk
www.ericandleslie.com
www.teen-aid.org
www.icrn.com/Beverly_LaHaye_Today